


Dear Jim

by 852_Prospect_Archivist



Category: The Sentinel
Genre: Drama, Pre-Slash
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-05-10
Updated: 2013-05-10
Packaged: 2017-12-11 10:55:29
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 636
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/797868
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/852_Prospect_Archivist/pseuds/852_Prospect_Archivist
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Some of Blair's thoughts about his relationship with Jim.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Dear Jim

## Dear Jim

#### by krossero

Author's website: <http://krossero.livejournal.com>  
They're not mine, but don't tell my muse. It'll make her cry.  
This is SO not my normal style. In this story, you will not see a first time OR a happy ending. But it's not a sad ending, either, so no worries!   
Thanks to Jane for the quick beta that ended up being not-so-quick!   
  
  
This story is a sequel to: 

* * *

Reflections 

When I said so long ago that I didn't realize that this was about friendship, it was true; I didn't know that you looked at it that way. Truthfully, I thought that the only reason I was still there was because you needed me for help with your senses. That's why I focused on them so much, even to the point of treating you like a lab rat. For that, I'm sorry. 

But for me, even back then, it had already changed from being about friendship to being about...something more. You've always been important to me, from that very first day I met you. I'll admit that at first, it was just because you were a Sentinel. That changed as soon as you came into my office, belligerent, impatient, frustrated and shoving me around in my own space. I could see that you were hurting, and I wanted to help you. 

Since then, you've been my friend, I've been your partner, and I like to think that we're better together than we are apart. That probably seems like a ridiculous notion to you. I know that we're not really in this for the same reasons anymore, if we ever were. You need me for your senses, and you want me around as your friend. I need you as my friend, and want you as...well, I just want you. 

I want your love, your whole attention, to be the one that holds you close at night. I've loved you for a long time, and I wish more than anything that you could love me, too. But that won't happen, so I stick around, and do my best to keep our friendship intact, even though I've screwed it up big time, repeatedly. Hopefully, the fact that I'm going to the Police Academy will help you to trust me again. That's not the only reason I'm doing it, though. I _do_ want to be a detective--it will give me a chance to help the world in ways that I never could have before. And I'm so grateful that I'm going to have the chance to be your partner, officially and permanently. 

I love you, Jim, and that's why I'm such a pushy, annoying, intrusive bastard, as you put it just an hour ago. I _have_ to push you, because if I didn't, things might be left unsaid, the way they were with Alex, and I'll never let it get that bad again. I hope you want me around for a long time, because I can't foresee a time when I won't need you; in any future, near or far. 

Now, I'm going to do my best to make amends, and you're going to shrug it off, because you know I was right when I said what I did. Then we'll act like we never fought, because I can't give you up, and you--I don't really know why you pretend. Could it be that you need me as much as I need you? Probably not. But maybe someday I'll ask, just to see what you have to say. 

* * *

End 

Dear Jim by krossero: krossero@yahoo.com  
Author and story notes above.

Disclaimer: _The Sentinel_ is owned etc. by Pet Fly, Inc. These pages and the stories on them are not meant to infringe on, nor are they endorsed by, Pet Fly, Inc. and Paramount. 


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